Dear Gavin: An open letter to the young ones

Dear Gab-gab, today we celebrate your existence and in line with the celebration is this open letter from your ma-attitude na Tita.

I have seven pointers for you, move along and read it. 

I will not support you in everything, but I will always push you to be a better person. I tend to be critical and sometimes I’ll give you truths that are hard to swallow. I will not be supportive in everything, but I’ll be a pusher for your growth so that you can be a better person. Sometimes I might not agree with the things that you want in life, deal with it. I don’t know everything, but I think I know if something will help you grow as a person. I won’t tolerate bad behavior either, so if you ever got jailed (for the love of God, I hope not) and it’s your fault I won’t bail you out.

If the time comes that you have to choose between being right or being kind, always choose to be kind. I’ll admit, I can’t follow this most of the time because people are testing me to a breaking point. But I guess what I’m trying to say is that there are a lot of things that people can argue with, but you should never argue whether if you have to be kind or or not.

Adults are not always right, and if you think I am wrong please correct me and make me understand. People want to be right all the time so they will stand their ground despite being presented with facts. I have a tendency to be a fanatic and will hold on to the truth that I know, but if I am in the wrong please teach me and make me see things. Trust me, the world is evolving pretty fast and there are ideologies right now that few people can’t grasp. Your parents may be wrong also, but you have to know that their decision making includes parental guts and instincts, whether it's right or not is debatable. I want to be a cool Tita so please don’t let me be a boomer, I’m open to constructive criticism.

“Life is not a wish-granting factory.- John Green” What I’m trying to say is that you have to work for your wish to come true. Be a goal-getter and don’t settle for less. If people around you can’t help you achieve things that you want to achieve, do it yourself and prove to them how capable you are. 

You’re not better than a woman. I promise to be one of your protectors but I swear to God, I will make your life miserable if you ever dare hurt any woman. I won’t tolerate such behavior. If you are man enough, you don’t have to be threatened and feel inferior to the point of hurting someone. Coming from a family dominated by females, you have a long way to go. You have to learn how strong (read as sometimes chaotic) our personalities are. Perhaps growing up around self-made women will help you grow as a fine and respectful man.

You will make mistakes, learn how to apologize.  I don’t know how to emphasize this enough to resonate not just with you but for everyone who’ll be able to read this. We celebrate people who are thankful and appreciative. We were taught to say “thank you” to the fast-food chain guards, food delivery guys, sanitation personnel, fruit vendors, and other people. But I want you to learn the importance of apologizing to people when you’re in the wrong. I know it’s easier said than done but rise above the notion of being right and just be apologetic. Remember that it’s harder to forgive when someone is not even sorry or apologetic, being non-apologetic is a red flag.

Your DNA does not define you. In our philosophy class, our instructor told us that man is neither good nor evil, so our probability of being good and bad is equal. This is me telling you that you came from a lineage with a lot of issues and angst, trust me on this because a much-concentrated DNA circulates me so I know. You’ll develop traits that are similar to your relatives but it does not define you. Rebel against the absurd, rise above your DNA and make your future.


Your capricious Tita who's listening to Taylor's All Too Well Autumn version while writing this.


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