When I participated in a clean-up drive the thing that really got me hook was its advocacy. I want to labelled myself as an eco-warrior and it was the least that I can do- aside from ditching straws, using eco-bags religiously, and trying to influence people from our household.

Looking back I remember my parents’ classic reminder to be careful with the people I meet online- the millennial term for don’t talk to strangers. And right now I just want to give myself a clap back.

Aside from a close friend, Maureen whom I drag into it so imagine my liabilities if bad things happens, I don’t know anything about the people I’ll be with. But I trust them and their advocacy and so I had to do a leap of faith.

Being in a vehicle with no clue with who they are was a liberating experience. I remember my favorite writer (Ate Trisha of P.S. I’m on my way) and can’t help thinking how proud she will be of me for finally having a brave heart and doing it. She is my life’s peg to be honest and I want to be like her but not really like her- I want to be like her but still be me if that makes sense to you.

Meeting people during these kinds of activities is much easier than meeting people in school. In school, it feels like it is required to be there but with these kind of activities you’ll know that these people you are with shared a common goal with you.

The lesson I gain from this is to trust people. If I didn’t maybe we wouldn’t make it to our very first meet up- someone from the group volunteered to fetch us in the terminal to go to the meet up place of the rented van that drove us to Zambales. If I didn’t give any trust we wouldn’t be home at peace and ease as well- the same people who volunteered to fetch us also volunteered to accompany us to up to the terminal where we can ride a bus going home.

People, it’s not wrong to be careful. Living in this kind of world, living with the kind of government and society we have right now is very dangerous. Being careful is something we have to be with us 24/7 but being careful doesn’t mean you don’t need to trust people.

Being brave is not just being risky. Being brave is knowing everything could be wrong and acknowledging that life and people are not perfect but you embrace it anyway. You embrace it because you know how to dissect if this will bring mishap or will do you good. Trust is indeed a strong word and only strong people can use it best, use it wisely.

It’s been months since I last written something and this is just me trying and forcing my writing juices to come. I wrote this around 2AM and this is all I’ve got.

When I was still studying I often hear my higher year Ates and Kuyas who already graduated from college rant about how hard it is in the real world. I keep hearing things like life is much more different in real life and stuff like that.

To be honest, I didn’t understand them. I was thinking what possibly can be harder than what we’ve had in college? I mean we were forced to do crazy stuff just to make ends meet so an eight hour office job will be just fine, right? It’s freedom- we’re finally free!

But little did I know.

During college we were forced to learn and adapt how to stay awake and efficient with just 3 hour sleep, and some days we even have less than that, with a quiz or exam that same day. Personally, I’ve experienced having to go to school for my 8:30AM class without sleep, aside from power naps that I feel guilty having during that time, and then go home at 10 in the evening to repeat the process of my non-existing sleep for more couple of days.

That time I keep saying that I can never be more tired than this, not possible. I can’t understand our working friends rant because all I ever wanted that time was to get the hell out of college and get done with studying. But I was wrong and so I would like to write a letter for the graduating students about the things I wish I knew when I was about to finish college.

Dear Graduates,

                To be honest I am not sure if I want to congratulate you or send you a warmest hug for I know you’ll need it soon.

                It might seems like a book’s index or glossary but trust me it’s just a chapter’s summary and there’s still a Unit Test that you need to pass before going forward. You’ll face questions that seems like not part of the previous chapter but you have to answer it anyway and I am here to tell you to answer it patiently. Think about it. Is it A, B, C, or D? One question but can either make or break you.

                Friends, life is not a race and you don’t have to speed up, but to be honest I’m not even sure if your speeding up process has anything to do with your own decision or just a mere pressure from the people around you. I can’t blame you. With the kind of society that we have it’s almost impossible not to be pressured because most of us has a tendency to feel like what we think right is right.

                But hear me on this, you are your own. If you really want to grow then decide for yourself. It doesn’t matter if you decide to be practical and choose a path that is way out of your career path for a greater good, what matters is that you keep your stand. Human up and face it. Who cares if you need to choose pay grade than your passion? Who freaking care if you only have enough to make a living while doing the thing you are passionate about?

                If you are here reading this to seek advice to help you choose between your passion or being practical then I have to disappoint you. I will not imply an answer to a question in which you can only answer. We have different kind of life and sometimes what is best for others won’t be best or even good for you. If you choose passion then by all means, go and be happy because I’m happy for you. If you choose to be practical and leave your passion aside then it’s fine, I’m still rooting for you and all I ever wanted you to know is that I hope you are happy, if not I hope you become one along the way.

If you are those lucky human being who doesn’t need to pick between the two then I am very much happy, I hope you shine and grow more and help others too because whether you like it or not people or your friends will get jealous of the life you have and I hope you are there to make them see that you are all different but are equally talented and good. You might not notice it or like it but there will be people whose pain will come from your happiness and success. You’re not at fault and you don’t owe them anything but I have to ask you to be there for them. Cheer them up, affirm them because there will be times where it’ll be hard for them. So be that tiny hole- that whistle on a pressure cooker- and don’t be a heat that produces pressure for they have too much.

Graduates, the next couple of months will be hard for you. The training wheels will be taken away and you’ll have this mental clock that will keep on ticking, making you want to speed up the process of growing. But remember this, you are your own. Do not let yourself drown by the sound of the clock because it’s all in your head and that ticking sound is just a mere pressure that you keep on getting and forming are just inside your mind.

You have the power to silence it and adjust the melody for you are the master of your own.

Graduation is not the answer or an escape for you are not done, not yet. The challenges and sufferings will not stop, the pain will actually intensifies and I will tell you to keep on holding on and keep fighting.

What I learn from the past few years is that you will only age in number and in physical form but you will never be old enough to break down or be ready to any problems that will only intensify as you age.

When you feel like giving up and feel like the next summary chapter is way beyond your reach, if you feel like you are stuck, if you feel like you already suffered enough and can’t take any longer, just look back and see the journey you took and the challenges that you surpassed. You are here now, you already suffer enough, ngayon ka pa ba susuko?

Congratulations on your graduation! You are not done, but it also doesn’t mean that you can’t start something new.

THERE’S NO SINGULAR FORMULA IN BEING A MINIMALIST

The common misconception of other when they hear that someone is a minimalist is the fact that they either wear same clothes and that everything is black and white. While this is partly true, I want people to know that being a minimalist is not limited to a certain color palette.

Using certain color palette does help but it’s not a must. As I’ve said, there’s no singular formula or rule to being minimalist. The goal that you have to mind is that you have to limit your belongings only to those that makes you happy. The goal of minimalism is to lessen distraction that hinders you to have the peaceful life that you deserve.

I don’t have a certain color palette in my clothing but I consider myself practicing minimalism in terms of clothing since I don’t spend that much with branded clothes. As I’ve said, no singular rule as to how to adapt minimalism.

Back then, I tend to hoard clothes since I always buy cheap ones and it has accumulated along the way and some ended up not being use at all! Now, I think I only have less than a 90 pieces of clothing (I know it’s still a lot but I’m still working on it, don’t worry!) and for some I might not have done proper purging but I am proud of what I’ve accomplished.

I learn to accept and realize that not everyone is the same and that’s fine. I don’t have same shirts that I use every day and I don’t have a color palette that people associate with minimalism.

IT IS A PROCESS, IT DOESN’T NEED TO HAPPEN IN A SNAP OF YOUR FINGERS

As I’ve said on my previous post about my journey to Minimalism it took me some time before I jump to it and even more time to be on the process. I said to myself ‘Okay, enough reading and researching. Do it now!’ but it didn’t happen in a snap of my fingers. It took me three weeks before I achieve a lighter room. To be fair I only did the work during weekend since I have a day job during weekdays.

During the first week I went and throw all the unnecessary items inside my and Lola’s room (we share a room). My Lola is a hoarder and you can only imagine how dusty it is underneath our bedframe where she keep stack of filmsy Tupperwares, the pasalubong containers, and I was even shocked to find planks! I also started purging clothes this week and I already purged a luggage full.

During the second week, I decided that I still have a lot of clothes and so I purge once again. Yes, it took me majority of the day since I also clean the cabinets. After purging I ended up with additional box full of clothes.

I was pretty proud of myself knowing loads of stash are going to be discarded.

Third week was hard, I decided to give my attention to my books and papers. After I clean my bookshelf I separate the books into three category, the one I’ll surely keep, maybe pile, and let go pile. I told myself that I need to be brutal about my books since it takes up too much space and it’s not healthy since I don’t have time to read that much. I let go of the books that mostly just pick my curiosity but is not my genre and the one that I bought because I thought I’ll be able to read it.

As of writing, I folded my clothes just earlier and upon doing so I purge ten more pieces. Minimalism is a journey, not a race to discard all your belongings.

IT’S NOT ABOUT HOW YOU ORGANIZE, IT’S THE HABIT YOU DO AFTER EVERYTHING IS ORGANIZED

For the past weeks I realized something and it was so simple and yet I was blown away by how it can affect my current state, a make or break deal to be honest.

It’s how you put the things after you use them.

Pretty simple right? Indeed, it is simple but it does make a lot of difference. I notice that half of the reason why our room is a mess is because of how I put my stuff after I used them. For instance, after I went home from work I discard my uniform and put it on a corner pile (not proud of it but it’s true) and then the next thing I know is that I have bunch of mixed clean and dirty clothes.

It’s also the case with my desk. One moment everything is organized then I need to write something so I’ll get a pen and a paper, then the next days I can’t see a single pen anymore because I didn’t put it back to where it was placed.

We’re not done with shoes yet. So technically most of my shoes have boxes and it’s not that I change the kind of shoes I use very often so I keep them under my bed at the end of the day, and then when a certain shoes wouldn’t complete an outfit I have to use another and the next thing I know is that all my shoes are now under our bed while their boxes are carefully stacked and empty.

You have to keep telling yourself that certain things must have a certain place to stay with. In doing so, you wouldn’t just improve your organization skills but it’ll also help you ease daily struggle in terms of finding pieces of belonging that you needed.

And I know it’s hard but trust me when I say that it’s all worth it.

RESPECT SOMEONE’S PLACE AND BELIEF

As I’ve said earlier I’m with my Lola and she is a hoarder. It is hard on my part because she keeps putting back the things I wanted to let go. Even though I’m 110% ready to let go of things she just keeps on getting it from my pile and carefully hide it together with her other clothes.

I’ve seen a video of a girl tidying up her mom’s place, a certified hoarder, who went out to do some errands. The caption says that her mom keeps accumulating things and she wanted to help and so she tidy her house for her. But I think it’s not right. Being a hoarder ( a little bit haha) myself and growing up with Lola who typically keep all the things that she think that she’ll be able to use someday is a lot of work. For me, what the girl in the video did was way out of the line and uncalled for. If you wanted people to respect the way you live then you should also practice respecting their way of living. You don’t go throwing people’s stuff away just because you wanted to help, you can help them but at least as for a permission to do so.

Now, in our room there is a corner full of clothes of my Lola (we used to share that corner) but even though she went on a vacation for more than a month I didn’t try to discard her clothes or belonging even though I know that half of the clothes were not even used for years because if that will be done to me I’ll be pissed and will probably spit fire.

Just because we life a minimalist and meaningful life doesn’t mean you are right and that everyone will follow suit. It just doesn’t work that way.

IT’S HARD UNTIL IT WASN’T

This, I can attest to. It took me months of reading and being curious to the world of minimalism and I keep asking and wondering if I can pull it until I decided it’s time and just jump into it geared with knowledge from my reading.

To be honest, it’s really not that easy. It’ll hurt you and make you doubt if you are still doing the right thing. You’ll contemplate if letting go your things will all be worth it or just a crazy phase that you’ll outgrow in the couple of months.

But the only thing you can do is to move forward. Keep purging and hopefully you’ll feel the lightness lift off from your chest and the next thing you know is that you are regularly purging through your belongings.

After 4 major weekend purging I was surprised when I realized that I was getting good at this. Every rest day I go through my belongings and declutter one or two pieces. My books that is under my ’maybe pile’ keeps on decreasing while my ‘to-go pile’ keeps on accumulating. I realized that I crave the lightness I feel when I maintain the space of our room.

It is indeed hard until it wasn’t anymore.